Drinking session humour or not

This really happened.

One time Oliver and I were out drinking...and this happened when we were already parents, he mentioned about what he'd do if he was a part of the landed elite (panginoong may lupa). After his plans of you know, giving acres and acres to his family and the poor, I told him this option:

What if you were super duper rich and you had this vast tracks of land to do away with? I'd suggested he get himself some Aetas who are really pint-sized (pygmy) and plant them on his soil. Use every technology and science that his money and power could afford and make them tall.

A bit racist or at least anti-sector-ist?! But at that time it was sooo funny. Maybe it was the two parts vodka one part lime that did it.

But just imagine. You get rows and rows of Aetas and feed them, care for them, make sure they don't budge until they grow an inch. And send them off....Then again, you'd need individual green-house types to protect each one from the elements. They can poop standing or sitting, good fertiliser!

OK, I'm a bit on the far side but like I said it has its humorous side. Or maybe it is in the delivery?

O heck, you decide...or not.

Tee hee!

Slow Motion Suits the Desert Best

In my previous blog I had a theory about how locals drive the way they do. I also stated that the speed they drive in inversely proportional to the speed they walk or move. This had some direct relations to the size of their feet.

Further thought and several real-life brushes with "evidence" have shown that there is also the memory of it all engraved in one's genetic memory and passed on from generation to generation.

Because desert weather can be terribly hot and dry, desert dwellers of long ago have perfected the technique of moving that results in the least amount of persipiration and therefore preserving water within the body and avoiding dehydration. This trait or habit has been passed on to desert dwellers of today who now have air conditioning and yet the memory of that particular basic survival technique still lingers. In fact it still is of some use come scorching summer time - in the months of June till September. Slower movements ensure that perspiration is kept at minimal levels and moisture within the body lasts longer. In days prior to plumbing, being able to move like a sloth means you will live longer!

So the next time you see the locals walking in slow motion, just remember Darwin's theory of survival by natural selection and evolution.

And don't think it's the heat wave giving you visions of really slow moving people or the stick of dope you had at hit at in college (no high lasts THAT long!) it's just...well...people doing what nature MUST make them do: move slow to survive.

Still despite really slow movements, they come much earlier than most brisk-walking Pinoys who have concocted the infamous "Filipino Time" which is two hours later than the set time. But then, that's another blog I have to do in the future :-)